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The Best Porn » Top Porn Sites » The Minion » Spencer's Review

The Minion

Pay Site

The women here are looking to earn a little extra cash and will pretty much do anything to get it. Enter The Minion, a hefty, hairy man these girls will have to fuck to get what they want.

Primary Niche: Wet N Messy Fetish
Secondary Niches: All FetishesBizarre Fetishes

past review An archived review which has since been replaced by a newer review.

pretty good

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Pic Quality:
Vid Count:
Vid Quality:

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The Minion Review by Spencer The Minion

Review by Spencer

Released Sep 4, '10 , Written Sep 2, '10

The Minion is up for review today, and I've only seen one or two other sites like this before. They found this dude they call the Minion - he's fat, he's nasty, he's rude, he's got a tiny cock, he's overly hairy, and he gets to fuck hot ass chicks. The scenes usually start with him eating, making a huge mess, taking a lot of shit to the girls, and they always fuck him anyway. It's part of a network of 17 sites, and you get access to all of them with your $30 monthly membership.

The Pros

  Pretty unique scenes.

The Minion himself, and the crazy scenes they produce, really make the site what it is here. The girls are hot, and there is lots of sex, blowjobs, and cumshots, but it's not typical porn. There's lots of disgusting antics, gross messes, and shit talking involved. Right when you might be getting into it, you get a shot of dude's big hairy ass, and it's tough to recover at times. However, it is most definitely hilarious, and the girls are quite sexy for the most part.

  Network access included.

In case you need some actual porn after getting semi-excited here, they have you covered in the form of network access. There's lots of interracial stuff going on, but no more Minion at least, lol.

Other Good Stuff:

  • Their content is exclusive for sure, as if you couldn't tell already.
  • The chicks here are quite hot. I don't know what they paid them to get humiliated by fucking this guy, but there's some lookers here.
  • At over 140 scenes, it's not too tiny of a site either. Don't get me wrong, as I'd love even more content, but it's larger than I thought it'd be.

The Cons

  Updates are quite slow here.

You get a new scene monthly or so at best, which isn't great at all. They can go even longer in between updates as well, but they do keep coming (for now at least).

  Navigation needs work; layout is too cluttered.

The way they laid out the site isn't good at all. They list several scenes on each page, but each scene has a ton of download links, a streaming video, etc. They're all right there on the main page, which means you have to scroll through a ton of shit to get to the next scene. If they put the scenes on their own pages, they could get rid of a lot of problems. They also don't feature any navigation options like a models index, or search area.

Minor Negatives:

  • The video quality here is average at best, and can go even lower than that. They could use a bump up in the quality department.
  • Although there are a ton of download links, all of them are WMV only. They offer full scenes, clips, smaller clips, more clips, less clips - they're clip crazy. But they do not have an other video type, except for the streaming option.

Bottom Line

The scenes are different, and the girls are hot, but this one won't be for everyone.

The Minion works more as a comedy site for me, as it's tough to get hard and excited when dude has creamed corn coming out of his mouth, dripping down his stomach as though he vomited all over himself. The shit talking is funny as well, but again, not totally sexy for me. What is sexy are the girls here, which seem to be a cut above the crowd. The girls try to get into it, and others just get fed up and are done with it. Beyond that, the numbers are decent, but the updates come pretty slowly. The quality could use a little work, as could the download options. The layout of the site isn't great either, and made for too much scrolling and clicking around pages. The content is very unique, but thankfully if you need some actual regular porn, they offer that in their network access as well.

Site Details

About the Content: 
Downloadable exclusive hardcore scenes featuring a fat, disgusting dude they call The Minion fucking some insanely hot chicks.

Download Managers: 
Yes, should work.
Channel Max: 16
Able to pause/resume.
Test Software: IDM

Download Speed: 
Download Mgr: 6.2MB/sec.
Browser: 750KB/sec.
(331MB video, 50Mbps cable internet)

Exclusive Info: 
Advertised: 100% exclusive.
My Opinion: Yes, as with most solo sites, they shoot all their own content.

File Sizes (HQ): 
JPG = ~400KB
ZIP = ~75MB
WMV = ~300MB
(average size, HQ)

HD Video: 
No HD quality videos.

Live Cams: 
No free live cam shows.

Logging In: 
Only user/pw required.
Saved after closing browser.
Videos don't require pw.
Very easy!

Model Appearance: 
Mix of models, mostly white.
Generally amateur to semi-pro.
Body types from thin to average.

Model Info: 
146 models total.
Ages 18-30.
Mostly U.S. based.

Other Content: 
No notable extras.

Other Details: 
Condoms seen often.
No music in most videos.

Pic Details: 
Amateur to semi-pro photography.
Little to no airbrushing.
Good lighting, bright colors.

Pic Dimensions (HQ): 
All = 1200 x 800

Streaming Player: 
Medium flash player.
Can jump ahead immediately.
2-4 second buffer.
Smooth playback.
Okay quality.

Updates in Last 7 Days: 
Last update was about a month ago.

Re-Review Status
Review Completed

New review has been completed on Oct 15, 2014 and will be released in less than a week.
We have an active member pass required to do a new review.

Back to: Current The Minion Review

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